Sometimes the key to positive action is knowing when to say no. As a business mentor, I’ve spent the last quarter of the year encouraging my clients to look at how they will spend next year working towards their goals, using high pay-off activities and triggers.
But where does the art of saying no come into it, you ask?
Knowing when to say no
Saying no to an opportunity may seem counterintuitive, but if the opportunity presented is more likely to distract you, or divert your time and finances away from your desired achievements, then you need to be able to do two things:
- Recognise when an opportunity is a distraction
- Be prepared to say no with positivity.
When an opportunity doesn’t serve your goals
Part of business goal planning is focused on setting short-term and longer-term goals. Achieving these goals is the only way to achieving a lifestyle that you choose and that makes you truly happy.
In his biography, ‘If Not Now, When?’, GB Olympic gold medalist rower Greg Seale asks, ‘does it make the boat go faster?’ He talks about every day-to-day decision and how it must serve the end goal of the boat going faster so it wins the race.
This a brilliant analogy for recognising when something you choose to do slows your progress to the finish line… Is the thing you choose to do a high pay off activity, making ‘your boat’ go faster, or is it ballast, holding you back?
Once you recognise that an activity or opportunity isn’t in fact going to aid your progress, how do you politely turn it down?
How to say no, in 3 positive steps
I want you to stop feeling guilty about saying no to something that doesn’t serve your goals. Realistically speaking, if you’re trying to do it all, being pulled every which way, it’s unlikely that you can succeed in the timeframe you planned or, dare I say, if at all.
- When saying no, try beginning with a positive sentiment, express appreciation for the offer, show respect for the person who has approached you and their business. Remember, they’re a focused businessperson too, who is hoping you’ll make their boat go faster!
- An explanation of your own goals and plan would likely be appreciated. Letting someone know why you can’t say yes and that it isn’t a personal decision but rather a business one, softens the blow.
- Do you have any ideas you could contribute to aid the person who approached you? This may not be a necessary step, but I find if you can offer support or assistance, it does serve your goal of building healthy business relationships and establishing you as a supportive connection.
I hope these considerations will help you remain focused in the new year, and if you do find yourself needing to say no, here are some useful phrases you could employ:
- ‘I’m not taking on any new projects at the moment’
- ‘Whilst I’m flattered, I’m not able to fit it in’
- ‘I appreciate the offer, but my commitments won’t allow me to take on anything more’
- ‘Thank you for thinking of me, but I must remain focused on…’
And my final tip, is to remember this simple formula…
Does it serve your goal – politely decline – offer alternative solution
go back to your positive year!
Wishing you all the best for a successful and positive year – Mike.